How humble are you? Enlightened leaders drive the bus. Their egos get parked at the back of the bus.
When I am working with companies to help them develop a leadership competency model, integrity and humility often come up at the top of the list. High-performing and emotionally intelligent leaders know when to check their egos at the door.
How healthy is your ego?
Leading with Humility: 3 Keys to a Healthy Ego
The health of a company’s culture is a reflection of the health of our conversations. Ego is a continuum: At one extreme, there is too much. When we have a big ego, we are overconfident and arrogant. When we have too little, we lack confidence and self-esteem.
There are three keys to developing balance:
- Humility
- Curiosity
- Veracity
Humility is the fulcrum that prevents a healthy ego from becoming unhealthy. It has the unique ability to open minds by keeping us curious and interested in others.
Unless we’re ready to listen and learn, curiosity and veracity won’t even have a chance to enter the game. Discussions and debates that facilitate progress require us to temporarily suspend what we think is best for us so we can consider the best interests of the business.
Humility Is Key
Without losing confidence in who we are or lessening the importance of what we’ve achieved, humility creates a desire to reach the next level of performance. It doesn’t lose sight of “me,” but it also prevents our personal needs and agendas from interfering with open dialogue and intense debate.
Humility swallows excessive ego and channels our ambitions into the success of “we,” rather than a selfish and short-lived agenda of “me.” It’s not the equivalent of being weak, ignored, indifferent, boring or a pushover. True humility is characterized by confidence, ambition and willpower.
When Jim Collins conducted his research for Good to Great, humility was one of only two characteristics he found that distinguish those who can lead top-performing companies from those who can transform their companies into great performers. (The other trait was intense professional will.)
Once humility creates an open mind, curiosity is the active ingredient that drives the exploration of ideas. It gives us permission and courage to test what we think, feel and believe to be true, reminding us we don’t know everything. When we lead with questions rather than answers, curiosity can strip us of an agenda and stop ego from spiraling out of control.
Veracity is the habitual pursuit of the truth. It is the third principle of ego management. It’s not that people don’t want the truth; after all, we all say we do. But we often don’t want all of it. We don’t want the part that’s hard to hear or doesn’t support our agenda.
If openness and progress are the outcomes of humility, and innovation is the aim of curiosity, then veracity is the light that exposes the truth.
Is your ego healthy or does it need to take a seat at the back of the bus?
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